I Can Wait (and Wait)

As a high school freshman, too young for a driver’s license and too old to grow up in a cell phone generation, I would wait (and wait) for my mother to pick me up from sports practices. Rarely could we set a definite pickup time since mom was always busy with five kids and I never knew exactly when my practices would end. What’s more, we could not easily call each other due to the aforementioned lack of cell phones. To complicate matters further, I would sometimes ride the activity bus if I could catch it in time, and with no ability to inform my mom of these bus trips, I forced her to wait and see if I arrived home before she knew whether or not to drive to the school and get me. On such occasions, we both waited (and waited).
 
I grew frustrated, even maddened, by the waiting and the eager expectation of hoping every car that rounded the corner was my mom’s. I could not understand what took her so long sometimes; answers didn’t come easy. But I never, ever doubted that she would arrive at some point. She saw more than what met the eye and her impending arrival helped me to endure those helpless feelings of being stuck and waiting (and waiting). In my mind, it was as though she could see me and hear me without being there. I felt near to my mom, so I could wait.
 
Those experiences and memories taught me something about waiting on God. Over the long months of dealing with the virus and its related restrictions, closures, delays, and cancellations, I’m reminded that I can wait for God if I know that He sees me and hears me. There’s so much I cannot even begin to understand; answers don’t come easy. But although God may not be there (in the sense of a tangible, physical presence), I feel near to Him, so I can wait.
 
As Sam (Leslie) Phillips sang in her song, Answers Don’t Come Easy:
 
Oh, and I can wait; it’s enough to know you can hear me now… it’s enough to feel so near you now, And when answers don’t come easy, I can wait. Mind’s eye can only see so far, and reason can only guess, but knowing you see more than what meets the eye helps me see through my helplessness.
 
Of course, God tells us to wait for Him and He makes incredible promises to those who do just that. So, I can wait (and wait) and it will be worth it.
 
Wait for the Lord; be strong, and let your heart take courage; wait for the Lord! (Psalm 27:14)
 
But they who wait for the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings like eagles; they shall run and not be weary; they shall walk and not faint. (Isaiah 40:31, ESV)
 
Troy Burns


The Rest of the Story

During the evening hours, if I sit on the couch to watch a show with my wife, I often doze off halfway into the show (if not sooner). Then, in the middle of the night, maybe around 3:00 a.m., I wake up to use the restroom and cannot get back to sleep. How can sleep come so easily during the regular evening hours, and yet elude me in those wee hours when I’m exhausted and can barely think straight? Then there’s my son, who can get into our car and fall fast asleep before we even make it out of our neighborhood. Thankfully, this only happens when he’s a passenger, not the driver!
 
I know I’m only talking about sleep, but these experiences cause me to wonder about the whole concept of rest. A line from next week’s reading in the Core 52 book jumped out at me: “It’s senseless to thank God for the job we have but not rest on the Sabbath when He promised it would increase our productivity.” As my family would attest, I have trouble just sitting still for a minute, let alone truly resting. Life is typically so busy that when I have an hour or two of downtime, I don’t feel grateful as much as guilty. How in the world can I devote an entire day of every week to rest? And is it really possible that I will get more done in six days of work than seven?
 
Many of us have no time for the things that matter the most, and that means we’ll never find rest for our souls. I’m sure God did not need rest, but He took a day off, anyway. Here’s what the Bible says about that: “By the seventh day God had finished the work he had been doing; so on the seventh day he rested from all his work. Then God blessed the seventh day and made it holy, because on it he rested from all the work of creating that he had done” (Genesis 2:2-3).
 
To be a little corny, you could say that’s the “rest of the story” of creation. God did not rest because He was exhausted; He rested to celebrate His creation and to put in place the principle of the Sabbath. This means that creation’s greatest productivity is within a cycle that includes rest. That’s the answer to my question of whether it’s possible to get more done in six days of work than seven. It may or may not help me sleep, but it will certainly focus my mind and heart on what matters the most, which will then lead to rest for my soul.
 
Troy Burns


Jumping Kids and Waiting Dads

One of my favorite memories is when my young children demonstrated a complete, unquestioning trust in their dad. My son, as a small toddler, walked out onto a diving board with his swim instructor and jumped into the water where I was waiting to catch him in my arms. My older daughter did a similar thing when she climbed several stairs and jumped down to me. Had my kids focused on anything else besides their dad, they would have lost faith and likely would not have jumped. But they were willing to take those leaps for one reason: they knew without a doubt their dad would catch them.
 
I always think of this when I read the passage in Matthew chapter 18, where Jesus is asked who is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven, and He responds in this way: “He called a little child to him, and placed the child among them. And he said: ‘Truly I tell you, unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven’” (Matthew 18:2-3).
 
Young children trust their parents completely, unless and until something breaks that trust. I want to live out that childlike faith in God, even if it’s difficult to do in any other aspect of life. I especially want this because so many things are uncertain. I hate that nothing is really ever for sure. I want to know for certain, every day, that I will live another day, and that my wife will be there with me every day, and that my kids will come home safely each and every night. But while I know these things are likely, I also know they’re not for sure.
 
In our current world situation, things are even more uncertain than normal. Not only is the virus a great unknown in many respects, but the related precautions, rules, and restrictions make it difficult to count on much of anything. To paraphrase an old saying, the only thing that’s for sure is that nothing is for sure.
 
Much of this life troubles me, scares me, and makes me realize how uncertain everything is. If I focus on anything besides my Dad, I’ll lose my faith. But God is my Father just like I am my children’s father. So, I still want to jump into His arms because I know He will catch me.
 
Troy Burns


I’ll Leave the Light On for You

A house is just a building; a home can be another thing altogether. I remember an old movie where the main character, a widower, described life with his wife as something that gave him the sense of coming home, only to no home he’d ever known. I’ve told my own wife many times (especially on handwritten notes or cards) that she makes our house a home. We even have this sign placed near the entryway into our house that reads, “What I love most about my home is who I share it with.” Home is an incredible thing when it’s all that it’s meant to be.
 
The story is told of a woman who hated her father, ran away from her home when she was 15, and planned never to return again. For quite a few years, she in fact did not return. But there were those nights, especially around the holidays, when she would drive down her old street, look at her house, and see the Christmas tree in the window along with the porchlight shining in the dark, as if to welcome anyone who might approach. It seemed that the light was always on.
 
The girl would not dare to go in, however, because of all that had happened between her and her parents. The porchlight continued to shine, though, reminding her of better times and memories of her mom and dad. And somehow, someway, she’d find herself there on Christmas Eve, parked on the street across from her parents’ house, drawing comfort from that little yellow porchlight.
 
Then one year, the girl who was now a woman grew tired of spending Christmas Eve in her car. She decided to take a risk and go home. Thankfully, she received a grand welcome with arms open wide to draw her close. As she hugged her mom in the doorway, the woman spoke of the porchlight and how it had always seemed to remain on, no matter when she drove by. Her mom smiled and her eyes filled with tears as she said, “You know, I always left that light on for you. Just in case you came home.”
 
Home. That’s what we try to create as husbands, wives, parents, and children. I know this world is not our home, but the people we love can give us a glimpse into what home is supposed to be. It’s the place where stories are told, lessons are taught, and memories are made. For the woman in the story—and maybe for all of us—home is a place where the light shines in the darkness. For me, home is the place where dreams come true, every single day.
 
Troy Burns


God is Good (All the Time)?

The first year I took our students to summer camp during my youth ministry years, a leader from another church would yell out, “God is good!” to which a large group of kids and counselors would reply, “All the time!” Then the leader would scream, “All the time!” to which the group would answer, “God is good!” This would continue for a few rounds, and I couldn’t help but wonder how many of the young people really believed that, and how many were just joining in with the other campers. The reason I wondered was that I had many questions myself. As a “mature” adult, I had to admit I wasn’t so sure. Was God only good and always good?
 
It’s difficult to believe in the goodness of God when we can’t find any tangible evidence of it. It’s certainly hard to believe that God is good all the time. But as a recent article pointed out, “faith is believing the Word of God and acting upon it, no matter how we feel, because God promises a good result.” That’s where we experience God’s goodness: He doesn’t often take away the bad things, but He does work for the good in all things, whether good, bad, or indifferent.
 
And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose (Romans 8:28).
 
A couple of weeks ago, during a message from our series, Getting Rid of the Gorilla, I shared that I don’t always understand what God wants and doesn’t want. There are things He wants me to do (or not do) sometimes, and I really feel like I can’t obey Him properly. In certain situations, I don’t want to do what God tells me to do, or I want to do what He tells me not to do. But for all of my failures and weaknesses, I strive to obey God, anyway, because that’s what I signed up for when I answered Jesus’ call to discipleship. I put my trust, my very life, in His hands because I believe He is good and He loves me and He not only knows what’s best for me, He wants what’s best for me.
 
All the time? God is good!
 
Troy Burns


No, Let Me Go First

It’s mostly wrong for me to focus on myself, but it can be helpful at times. This morning, for example, I ran across a quote from Abbot Tryphon that reminded me of what I should tell myself often: “When we take our eyes off our own sins, we focus only on the sins of the other.” When I give my full attention to the shortcomings of other people, I forget to fight the battles against my own failures that cause me to miss the mark and to fall short of God’s best for me.
 
Proverbs 4:23 tells us, “Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it.” Applying that truth to this blog, when I ignore my own weaknesses, I let my guard down and my heart is unhealthy. On the other hand, when I remember my own sins, I realize how much grace and forgiveness I need, which makes me less likely to see (much less judge) the sins of others.
 
Jesus spoke about this issue in Matthew 7:3-5:
“Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother’s eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye? How can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ when all the time there is a plank in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother’s eye.”
 
It’s easy for me to judge the angry person in traffic who honks and yells at another driver—a complete stranger to him—while forgetting how I flew off the handle at my own wife, who loves me more than anyone in the world. In other words, it’s easy to see the speck of dust in someone else’s eye and forget about the plank in my own eye. As I’ll share in the next message from our series, Getting Rid of the Gorilla, I’ve run five marathons and numerous other races of various distances. In some of those races, I zipped by quite a few people, feeling good about myself, like I was some impressive runner. But I compared myself to the wrong people; the runners who won those races, or who were fast enough to have a chance to win, brought me back down to earth. I did not see those runners after the start of the race for one simple reason: I could never keep up with them.
 
Something like that happens when I think about the sins and failures of other people. I forget that the yardstick for moral comparison is not another person, but God Himself. Of course I will appear more moral to myself than the gossip who slandered me or the office supervisor who mistreated me. Pain makes it hard to be objective and I will always seem better in my own eyes than the person who hurt me.
 
In the movie, Blue Like Jazz, the main character, Don, is a Southern Baptist youth who flees his fundamentalist upbringing when he goes to college, and who starts to realize how he has set a bad example for those who don’t follow Jesus. Near the end of the movie, Don sets up a confession booth on campus and as it turns out, it’s not for him to take confessions, but to give them. When the first person comes in to talk, Don stops him and says, “No, let me go first.” He insists on being the one to confess his sin. In my own life, the next time I believe another person is sinning, or when someone comes up to me and wants to confess something, I might just stop them and say, “No, let me go first.”
 
Troy Burns


God, Can I Tell You Something?

Are we allowed to be completely honest with God? In the face of all the pain, suffering, and despair of our current situation in the world, I’ve thought about something that’s actually quite common in the Bible: expressing our troubles and praying for help in coming out of pain. The big word for this is lamentation, which is a passionate expression of sorrow or grief. At least one-third of the Psalms are laments and we see these types of statements frequently in the book of Job. In fact, Job cursed the very day he was born, saying, “Why did I not perish at birth, and die as I came from the womb?” (Job 3:11). We also find the Old Testament prophets crying out to God and the book of Lamentations communicates the confusion and suffering that followed the destruction of Jerusalem by the Babylonians.
 
On top of that, we find many examples of lamenting in the New Testament. People who are sick and in pain cry out to Jesus for help. For example, Bartimaeus, the blind beggar, shouted out, “Jesus, Son of David, have mercy on me!” (Mark 10:47). Jesus Himself cried out to His Father God in times of anguish and suffering. Just before He was arrested in the garden, He prayed, “Father, if you are willing, take this cup from me; yet not my will, but yours be done.” (Luke 22:42). And during His extreme agony on the cross, Jesus cried out in a loud voice, saying, “My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?” (Matthew 27:46).
 
Obviously, prayers of lament and expressions of sorrow or grief appear often in the pages of Scripture, which leads me to wonder if we may have lost touch with this dimension of prayer. Perhaps we feel like that type of “venting” to God is inappropriate or even flat-out wrong. But when we hurt physically, we cry out in pain, so when we hurt spiritually, why can’t we cry out in lament?
 
During those times when it seems that God has forsaken us, we might believe that we should not feel that way or that we might even be losing our faith. But the truth is that lamenting can demonstrate a genuine, more complete kind of faith. In the Bible, faith is not just an intellectual acknowledgement or understanding that God exists; it’s entrusting our entire selves to God. If we’re being honest, we know that sometimes we experience God’s absence and we have serious doubts and struggles. But lamenting is an act of faith, not a failure of faith. We cry out to God because, deep down, we know He is there, that He cares, and that our relationship with Him matters.
 
Troy Burns


Truth be Told?

Here’s a typical definition of truth – “That which is true or in accordance with fact or reality.” A more realistic definition and explanation, at least in the sense of people’s common usage, is offered by Psychology Today: “Truth is a property not so much of thoughts and ideas but more properly of beliefs and assertions. But to believe or assert something is not enough to make it true.”
 
The truth weighs heavily on my mind these days, since it’s so hard to know what’s factual when it comes to this virus that’s spread around the world. How contagious is it? How dangerous or deadly is it? What are the best short- and long-term precautions to take? What does a safe reopening of business look like? Those are just a few of the questions, but the whole situation leads me to wonder what the truth really is. Of course, this is the age-old question, isn’t it?
 
When the Jewish leaders took Jesus before the Roman governor, Pilate, Jesus said, “the reason I was born and came into the world is to testify to the truth. Everyone on the side of truth listens to me.” In response to this statement, Pilate replied, “What is truth?” (John 18:37-38). Since Pilate did not wait for an answer, it seems that he spoke rhetorically. Some believe that Pilate was essentially joking around or being sarcastic; others wonder if he had a genuine desire to know what was true. Perhaps Pilate believed that finding the truth was only wishful thinking. In any case, the idea is that it’s very difficult, sometimes impossible, to know what’s true.
 
It’s no wonder God ensured that His Word, the Bible, was recorded and preserved as the truth He wants us to know about Himself. In a world where truth can be so hard to determine, it’s comforting to know that truth does exist and that God Himself has given it to us. Jesus confirmed this when He said, “Sanctify them by the truth; your word is truth” (John 17:17). And the apostle Paul pointed out the source and importance of God’s Word: “All Scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness” (2 Timothy 3:16).
 
I want to know the truth; we all do. Thankfully, we have the truth and I pray it directs our paths as we navigate the questions and uncertainties and doubts and struggles we all face in this life. Truth be told, that’s all we really need.
 
Troy Burns


You’ve Got This Girl!

Although this weekend is Mother’s Day (and I’m clearly not a mother), my mind weighs heavily on this whole thing called parenthood. If I’m being very honest, I feel guilty at times for bringing kids into a world full of so much pain, struggle, and disappointment. Of course, being a dad has been my biggest blessing in this life, but then I feel selfish if my joy comes at a cost to my kids.
 
This has hit me especially hard in recent weeks, given that my older daughter is finishing her senior year in high school, and she’s lost so many of the amazing experiences that are supposed to go along with that rite of passage. She had her last day on campus without knowing it was her last day ever. Her final season of Track & Field? Gone. Her Senior Prom? Gone. Her Senior Trip to Chelan? Gone. A normal, in-person graduation ceremony? Probably gone, too. And those are just a few of her many, many losses. In the big picture, I know she will be fine and that many people deal with far greater tragedies. Still, my father’s heart breaks for her.
 
I love my daughter so much. She has changed me for the better, in ways that I never dreamed were possible. But I have to wonder, are those things I love about fatherhood somehow meaningless if my girl suffers just for having the misfortune of living during a time when so many good things are taken away? How do I tell her, “God has a plan for you,” when her world is crashing down?
 
It is truly soul-crushing to see your child in pain and losing so much. Yet, despite a few breakdowns, I must say that she’s handling it much better than I would have at her age. And what helps me a little is knowing that God is a Dad, too; He knows my heartbreak, and then some. He gave up His only Son, who willingly lost everything for the sake of the world He loved so much:
 
For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life. (John 3:16).
 
Jesus could have put a stop to His pain and suffering, but He chose to go through it anyway, just so the people He loved would not have to:
 
He made himself nothing by taking the very nature of a servant, being made in human likeness. And being found in appearance as a man, he humbled himself by becoming obedient to death—even death on a cross! (Philippians 2:7-8)
 
I’m in awe of the fact that God gives His people so much choice and control when it comes to bringing a child into this world. Yet God is still the one doing the creating, even though we play a key role in the process. My wife and I gave life to our daughter, as they say, but really God was the One who did all of the live giving. And He did it on purpose. He created her for a reason and she will understand it one day:
 
You are worthy, our Lord and God, to receive glory and honor and power, for you created all things, and by your will they were created and have their being. (Revelation 4:11).
 
Sweet daughter, God meant for you to be here. To paraphrase Esther 4:14 and apply it your situation, “And who knows but that you have come to [this circumstance] for such a time as this?” You will do great things for God and His people. You’ve got this girl!
 
Troy Burns


That’s Not My Favorite Verse Anymore

I’m as excited as anyone to see our current world situation improve and to have our lives start shifting back to normal. I’m reminded of the joke where someone says, This too shall pass, and another person responds with, “Yes, like a kidney stone!” That’s an interesting phrase—This too shall pass—it sounds biblical, right?
 
Have you ever “known” something to be true from God’s Word, but then eventually discovered that your belief was not quite accurate? For me, a recent example is when I “knew” that the Bible says, This too shall pass. While the Bible does express ideas similar to that phrase, those words actually do not appear in Scripture, at least not in the way we typically use them.
 
Why do I mention this? For a long time, my favorite verse in the Bible was this one: “But He knows the way I take; When He has tried me, I shall come forth as gold” (Job 23:10). The reason I loved that verse, however, turned out to be a misunderstanding on my part. I thought Job’s words were similar to what we read in James: “Consider it all joy, my brethren, when you encounter various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith produces endurance. And let endurance have its perfect result, so that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing” (James 1:2-4).
 
I was wrong. In the context of Job chapter 23, we find out that Job was actually so convinced of his own innocence that he wanted to state his case directly before God, having the confidence that God would find no guilt in him. Job says, “I have kept his way without turning aside,” and “I have not departed from the commands of his lips.” Later on, Job also says, “Let God weigh me in honest scales and he will know that I am blameless” (Job 31:6). I do not share Job’s confidence. I am not innocent and I have no desire to state my case directly before God, because He would find me guilty.
 
It’s not hard to understand why Job was so confident in his own innocence. After all, God practically brags about him to Satan when He says this: “Then the Lord said to Satan, “Have you considered my servant Job? There is no one on earth like him; he is blameless and upright, a man who fears God and shuns evil” (Job 1:8). God doesn’t say that about me because He would be lying, and that’s impossible for Him to do.
 
Here’s my point in all of this: Job 23:10 was my favorite verse for a long time because I read it as a standalone sentence, quoted at the beginning of a novel I read in college. We can make the Bible say almost anything we want it to say, if we only read individual verses or portions of verses. Now that I understand the context of that verse in Job, it’s no longer my favorite. I am in awe of the verse. I wish I could say that about myself. But I cannot. The verse does not apply to me.
 
The Bible is true, but we must make the effort to read it properly. Most of it is not difficult to understand, but it’s very easy to misunderstand when we don’t take it as a whole. When I look around at this crazy world, I do believe that this too shall pass, but it’s not because the Bible says that exactly. And I do believe that God will strengthen my faith when I endure various trials, but it’s not because of Job 23:10; it’s because of James 1:2-4 and other similar passages. I guess it turns out that my favorite verses are the ones that I read as God intended them. Go figure!
 
Troy Burns